Martha Shrekart

home of only the finest home cooking


Twinkalicious Dessert Treat for the Diabetic

Ingredients:

  • 1 pack of dreamies from your local shrek-mart

    • Instructions:

    1. Tear open box and devour contents (plastic is probably edible).

    Un-pickled Pickle

    Ingredients:

  • 1 single crunchy cutecumber

    • Instructions:

    1. Check for a pulse.
    2. Yell "Rick, is that you!?" to make sure it's not Rick
    3. Doesn't matter if it is or isn't Rick, stick in mouth.
    4. Crunch (and/or screams)

    Boba but with Worms

    Ingredients:

  • Smol earth sneks
  • Suspoocious green sludge
  • Unwashed cup
  • Plastic straw (to keep the turtle population in check)

    • Instructions:

    1. Boil worms for 10 minutes.
    2. Dump worms in the sludge.
    3. SlueruurureueruPppp em down.
    4. Throw straw in big water.

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    About Me (where me refers to me, not you):

    Hi im Martha and this is my cooking blog, Ive been cooking for myself ever sense my family abandoned me in a swamp at age 7. I was trained in the cullanary arts at age 7. ive been a world ronowned chef sense age 7 and a half and ive seen my share of pain being a nurse in the orge/fairy war at age 8. so trust me when I say that im not funny and this is hard.